Take Up Thy Cross

Lu 9:23 And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me.
Mt 19:21 Jesus said unto him, If thou wilt be perfect, go and sell that thou hast, and give to the poor, and thou shalt have treasure in heaven: and come and follow me.
Jas 1:4 But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.
Lu 21:19 In your patience possess ye your souls.

I hope this blog will make sense.

It's so interesting how periodically, we find ourselves at a major crossroads. (Appropriately named.) It's like, the Lord seems to bring things into our path that just seem SO PERFECT. And we think, "This just HAS to be the will of God..." because it just seems to fit every answer to every prayer of the heart, that only the Lord hears. You know - the ones you pray silently at the altar, hiding the petition in your heart before the Lord, not sharing it with anyone. I'm talking about THOSE prayers. Well, the Lord had answered one of mine, I had thought. But it turns out that He had other plans in mind. During the course of the last few weeks, I began to feel as though the Lord was leading in a different direction than I had originally thought. At first, I must confess, I was crushed in my heart, and I whined before the Lord about it. I cried so many tears, I didn't think I had any left. My heart was so heavy, and so disoriented, because I just didn't understand. It just didn't make sense to me whatsoever. Then, I began to realize...

If I'm not willing to give something up - no matter what it is - for the Lord, then I really don't need it in my life anyway. When Jesus asked Peter, "Lovest thou me more than these?" Jesus was really asking, "Do you love Me enough and are you willing to lay it all down and follow Me wherever I am leading you, no matter what it may cost?" Basically, the Lord is asking me, "Shanna, lovest thou Me more than _________?" Of course, He knows the answer. He knows whether or not when I arrive at the next docking station of my spiritual walk, whether or not ________ would keep me from being fully, 100% dedicated to Him and only Him. Only He really knows. But obviously, He sees fit for His will and good pleasure for me to lay it at His feet as a sacrifice. And no matter how uncomfortable the sacrifice may seem:

2Co 12:9 And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
10 Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.
1Co 6:20 For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's.

I'm telling you, if I have ever needed the grace of God working strongly in my life, I surely need it now. I mean, I REALLY need it RIGHT NOW. But, isn't that what being a servant of the Most High God is all about? When Jesus ransomed me, it was not with some obsolete foreign currency that has no value in the world's monetary system. It was with His own blood. He gave His best for me, so what's a little sacrifice of my self will in comparison? If I'm not willing to give up the simplest thing for Him, then I am not a faithful steward of my life anyway, and who knows what else I'd be willing to hoard in exchange for my soul???

I feel very strongly that the Lord is calling each and every one of us to this level of sacrifice. Because when Jesus challenged Peter about his level of love toward the Lord, it was the beginning of a new level of power and anointing for Peter and the Church as a whole. Somehow in that exchange between Peter and the Lord, it was made known to Peter's heart that his degree of surrender and sacrifice to the Lord had to go deeper. Sure, he walked with Jesus as a disciple, witnessed His power, felt the agony of His crucifixion, but even still, he had a deeper place to go. Jesus was pulling for Peter, and wanted so badly for him to make it - as He does for all of us. No doubt, that's why he could say:

2Pe 3:9 ¶ The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.

The Lord places us in these valleys of decision; these crossroads; these Gethsemane's - because He wants us to make it. Not only does He want us to make it, He wants us to have power and victory all the way, not just to slide in by the skin of our teeth. Though our natural mind can't conceive the divine purpose and plan behind it all:

Ro 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

Every single thing the Lord does in our lives knits together and forms this awesome picture of what the Lord calls "good." The Church is called to perfection. We are all called to perfection as individuals. That's His purpose. So He knows what it will take to accomplish that purpose. I was so blessed by Brother Smith's article in the Evening Light this month, "Purity Before Power." Part of being pure is being rid of self will. It's our own will that contaminates us and leaves us defiled before the Lord. And the Lord knows that, which is why He ordains our steps the way He does - so that we are walking in His divine protection from the corruption that our flesh and the enemy would love to destroy us with. It is always in our best interest - excuse me, let me talk to myself for a moment - it is always in my best interest to follow the leading of the Holy Ghost, because He is the One who knows the will of the Father, and can reveal it to my heart, and guide me in it. He's the only One. In moments where my natural mind wants to question, or my flesh wants to resist, that's where I must fall to my face before the Lord and allow His grace to abound more and more.

Jas 4:6 But he giveth more grace. Wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble.

There is more grace to be given. Thank the Lord He is an ever present help in trouble. Thank the Lord I do not have to walk this road alone, even though it may feel sometimes as though I am alone. Thank the Lord that He is not a man that He should lie, that He cannot lie, and that it is IMPOSSIBLE for Him to lie. His Word is settled forever. My expectation is from Him. He alone is my rock, salvation, and defense, I shall not be moved.

So I say to all of you - take courage. The Lord is fully aware of every season of our lives, and nothing catches Him by surprise. He knows exactly where we are and where we're headed. His grace is more than enough for us to make it along the crossroads, and to stay there as long as He sees fit.

*Shanna*